Saturday, February 26, 2005
Sarah...*shakes head* - Plus, Josh's Message
He still doesn't like me. He likes John and Dad (relatively) and Josh fed him and held him and stuff. Grr. I don't think Sarah will ever like me. :(
Josh is over right now. He's making girly giggles at Lara on the phone. It's very amusing. VERY amusing.
Well, I didn't really have anything else to write about but I wanted to update anyways. Talk to you shmoes later.
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He still doesn't like me. He likes John and Dad (relatively) and Josh fed him and held him and stuff. Grr. I don't think Sarah will ever like me. :(
Josh is over right now. He's making girly giggles at Lara on the phone. It's very amusing. VERY amusing.
Well, I didn't really have anything else to write about but I wanted to update anyways. Talk to you shmoes later.
Friday, February 25, 2005
Have you RACKed someone today??? - Plus, Stolen ideas
Nothing really to post on so I'll just steal a few ideas:
I was told to take something familiar, something everyone would know, type it out in English, translate it into one language, take what you get, translate it into another language and so-on, finally translating it back into English and seeing how different it is; proving that we lose things in translation. Here goes!
THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Translated from English into German, then French, then Greek, then back to English:
The PROMISE of ALLEVIATION I promise the alleviation in the flag of marquage States of America and in the democracy, for which it is, a nation under the indivisible God where with the freedom and the justice for all.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
An idea for a blog stolen from my friend who stole it from her friend:
TEN random things about me:
1. I like penguins
2. My eyes change colors
3. I have a male cockatiel named Sarah
4. I want to be a vet tech, wife and mom when I grow up
5. I'm a control freak
6. Pine Cove and the shower are the only places that I've found where can lose myself in God
7. I'm homeschooled
8. My shoe size varies from an 8 to a 10 & 1/2 depending on the shoe
9. I have a horrible or great sense of humor depending on who you ask
10. I'm taking German and wish to be fluent in it
NINE ways to win my heart:
1. Tell me you love me
2. Do little romantic things for me just because you can
3. Let me know (in a kind way) when I'm being stupid
4. Tell me I'm beautiful
5. Be supportive
6. Be respectful
7. Love God
8. Pursue me
9. Be your own person
EIGHT things i want to do before i die:
1. Hold/play with a penguin
2. Be as good of a wife as I can for my husband
3. Be the best mom I can be
4. Go to Austria, Germany, and New Zealand
5. Become fluent in German
6. Be a light for Christ
7. Hold my grandchildren
8. Have a female German Shepherd named Sophie
SEVEN things that make me happy:
1. Josh
2. All my friends
3. Penguins
4. Listening to my German CD
5. When someone compliments me
6. When someone asks me to hang out with them
7. Making stupid jokes just to see people's reactions
SIX things that make me mad:
1. When people react poorly/violently to the stupid jokes I make
2. Annoying people (mainly brothers)
3. Selfishness
4. Arrogance
5. Intentional hurting of other people
6. When someone insists on doing it the easy way instead of taking an extra five minutes to do it right the first time
FIVE things i'm afraid of:
1. Marrying the wrong guy and viewing myself as "stuck" with him
2. Being kidnapped and/or raped
3. Someone stalking me
4. Parenting my kids like my parents parent William/me and John
5. Tornadoes
FOUR of my favorite items in my room:
1. My Bed
2. Aaro (my pengiun that Josh gave me) [said like "arrow"]
3. My stereo/radio
4. My pillow
THREE things i do every day:
1. Brush my teeth
2. Talk to Josh (unless I'm out of town)
3. Pet my dogs
TWO things i need to do right now:
1. Do schoolwork
2. Work with Sarah
ONE person i want to see right now:
1. Josh
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Speaking of stupid jokes, I made one up last night. It's going to go on our SAPNOT t-shirts:
Have you RACKed someone today???
Random
Acts of
Christian
Kindness
|
Nothing really to post on so I'll just steal a few ideas:
I was told to take something familiar, something everyone would know, type it out in English, translate it into one language, take what you get, translate it into another language and so-on, finally translating it back into English and seeing how different it is; proving that we lose things in translation. Here goes!
THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Translated from English into German, then French, then Greek, then back to English:
The PROMISE of ALLEVIATION I promise the alleviation in the flag of marquage States of America and in the democracy, for which it is, a nation under the indivisible God where with the freedom and the justice for all.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
An idea for a blog stolen from my friend who stole it from her friend:
TEN random things about me:
1. I like penguins
2. My eyes change colors
3. I have a male cockatiel named Sarah
4. I want to be a vet tech, wife and mom when I grow up
5. I'm a control freak
6. Pine Cove and the shower are the only places that I've found where can lose myself in God
7. I'm homeschooled
8. My shoe size varies from an 8 to a 10 & 1/2 depending on the shoe
9. I have a horrible or great sense of humor depending on who you ask
10. I'm taking German and wish to be fluent in it
NINE ways to win my heart:
1. Tell me you love me
2. Do little romantic things for me just because you can
3. Let me know (in a kind way) when I'm being stupid
4. Tell me I'm beautiful
5. Be supportive
6. Be respectful
7. Love God
8. Pursue me
9. Be your own person
EIGHT things i want to do before i die:
1. Hold/play with a penguin
2. Be as good of a wife as I can for my husband
3. Be the best mom I can be
4. Go to Austria, Germany, and New Zealand
5. Become fluent in German
6. Be a light for Christ
7. Hold my grandchildren
8. Have a female German Shepherd named Sophie
SEVEN things that make me happy:
1. Josh
2. All my friends
3. Penguins
4. Listening to my German CD
5. When someone compliments me
6. When someone asks me to hang out with them
7. Making stupid jokes just to see people's reactions
SIX things that make me mad:
1. When people react poorly/violently to the stupid jokes I make
2. Annoying people (mainly brothers)
3. Selfishness
4. Arrogance
5. Intentional hurting of other people
6. When someone insists on doing it the easy way instead of taking an extra five minutes to do it right the first time
FIVE things i'm afraid of:
1. Marrying the wrong guy and viewing myself as "stuck" with him
2. Being kidnapped and/or raped
3. Someone stalking me
4. Parenting my kids like my parents parent William/me and John
5. Tornadoes
FOUR of my favorite items in my room:
1. My Bed
2. Aaro (my pengiun that Josh gave me) [said like "arrow"]
3. My stereo/radio
4. My pillow
THREE things i do every day:
1. Brush my teeth
2. Talk to Josh (unless I'm out of town)
3. Pet my dogs
TWO things i need to do right now:
1. Do schoolwork
2. Work with Sarah
ONE person i want to see right now:
1. Josh
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Speaking of stupid jokes, I made one up last night. It's going to go on our SAPNOT t-shirts:
Have you RACKed someone today???
Random
Acts of
Christian
Kindness
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Sarah's Here - Plus, Talking A Lot
So last night I went to coffee with Tracy. She's amazing. I love her.
Seanathan was so bummed last night. I talked to him a little once I got home, but he still sounded sad. Stupid drama.
Sarah is as beautiful as he can be. No, that's not a typo, my cockatiel is a male and his name is Sarah - he came named. He's still not used to us yet (he only got here last night) so he is agressive when we put our fingers up to the cage, but he'll get used to us and befor you know it he'll be playing on his jungle-gym in no time at all!
Jenny came over today. We talked about lots of stuff. Pets, parents, boyfriends, school, all sorts of fun stuff like that. She would have stayed for lunch, but she had a meeting she had to be at that popped up at the last minute. Maybe next time.
Josh asked me out for Saturday. Don't know what we're going to do yet, but it'll be fun as always! Josh never ceases to amaze me. He's so incredible all the time. He's wonderful. I am so blessed to have him. I'm glad God brought him to me. And I'm really glad that he loves me as much as I love him.
I didn't do any schoolwork yesterday so I'd better get in there and do some today. Talk to you all later! Thanks again for putting up with me.
|
So last night I went to coffee with Tracy. She's amazing. I love her.
Seanathan was so bummed last night. I talked to him a little once I got home, but he still sounded sad. Stupid drama.
Sarah is as beautiful as he can be. No, that's not a typo, my cockatiel is a male and his name is Sarah - he came named. He's still not used to us yet (he only got here last night) so he is agressive when we put our fingers up to the cage, but he'll get used to us and befor you know it he'll be playing on his jungle-gym in no time at all!
Jenny came over today. We talked about lots of stuff. Pets, parents, boyfriends, school, all sorts of fun stuff like that. She would have stayed for lunch, but she had a meeting she had to be at that popped up at the last minute. Maybe next time.
Josh asked me out for Saturday. Don't know what we're going to do yet, but it'll be fun as always! Josh never ceases to amaze me. He's so incredible all the time. He's wonderful. I am so blessed to have him. I'm glad God brought him to me. And I'm really glad that he loves me as much as I love him.
I didn't do any schoolwork yesterday so I'd better get in there and do some today. Talk to you all later! Thanks again for putting up with me.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Wakeup Call - Plus, Apologies From the Author
First, I want to apologize to all of you for letting myself sink into the hole of selfishness and refusing to look up and climb out. I put my blinders on and just stared into the mirror, only seeing my problems and refusing to see how many wonderful friends I have. I apologize for being so selfish and if I hurt you during this I really do want to sincerely apologize. I'm sorry I put you all through this.
I also want to apologize for being so rude in person. I was informed yesterday that I was snapping a lot to a specific person on Sunday. I didn't know I was doing it, and I apologize to you for doing so.
Thank you to all my dearest friends who pulled the blinders away from my face and helped me. Thank you to all of you who do care. I apologize for not seeing you before. Thank you to Josh, Nancy and Seanathan, who pulled me aside and talked to me. Thank you to Kaylah and Tracy, who are in the midst of doing so. Thank you Lara and Christina for trying to comment some sense into me. To my closest friends: I'm sorry I put you through this. You are all wonderful and I thank you dearly. I owe you all a big one!
Ok. *calms self down, wipes tears off face*
I don't know if I've said this yet on here (most likely not, considering my attitude previous) but I'm most likely getting a Cockatiel tonight. His/her (they thought it was a girl but now have reason to believe it's a boy) name is Sarah, she's only 8, and is used to being handled. Cockatiels usually live to be 15 or 16 so I'll have her for a while. Plus, she'll be my pet. Not my family's pet, but MY pet. Meaning, when I leave for college I can take Sarah with me. I think it'd be funny if Sarah turns out to be a boy - I'd have a boy cockatiel named Sarah. He he he.
I decided last night that I want Heather to do my Senior pictures - she's absolutely amazing! Aughk! So good! *does Teen Girl Squad's 'so good'*
Well, I must go shower and do schoolwork and such things. I hope this post is a lot happier sounding than the rest. Can't wait to see if Daddy brings Sarah home tonight!
|
First, I want to apologize to all of you for letting myself sink into the hole of selfishness and refusing to look up and climb out. I put my blinders on and just stared into the mirror, only seeing my problems and refusing to see how many wonderful friends I have. I apologize for being so selfish and if I hurt you during this I really do want to sincerely apologize. I'm sorry I put you all through this.
I also want to apologize for being so rude in person. I was informed yesterday that I was snapping a lot to a specific person on Sunday. I didn't know I was doing it, and I apologize to you for doing so.
Thank you to all my dearest friends who pulled the blinders away from my face and helped me. Thank you to all of you who do care. I apologize for not seeing you before. Thank you to Josh, Nancy and Seanathan, who pulled me aside and talked to me. Thank you to Kaylah and Tracy, who are in the midst of doing so. Thank you Lara and Christina for trying to comment some sense into me. To my closest friends: I'm sorry I put you through this. You are all wonderful and I thank you dearly. I owe you all a big one!
Ok. *calms self down, wipes tears off face*
I don't know if I've said this yet on here (most likely not, considering my attitude previous) but I'm most likely getting a Cockatiel tonight. His/her (they thought it was a girl but now have reason to believe it's a boy) name is Sarah, she's only 8, and is used to being handled. Cockatiels usually live to be 15 or 16 so I'll have her for a while. Plus, she'll be my pet. Not my family's pet, but MY pet. Meaning, when I leave for college I can take Sarah with me. I think it'd be funny if Sarah turns out to be a boy - I'd have a boy cockatiel named Sarah. He he he.
I decided last night that I want Heather to do my Senior pictures - she's absolutely amazing! Aughk! So good! *does Teen Girl Squad's 'so good'*
Well, I must go shower and do schoolwork and such things. I hope this post is a lot happier sounding than the rest. Can't wait to see if Daddy brings Sarah home tonight!
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Why??? - Plus, Why???
Why do I have to be the stupidest person on the face of this planet? Why is it that after being so "good" all my life (wanting to do wrong but doing good because that was what was better) I am now faced with more rebellion than ever and falling into it little by little? Why is it that I have to be who I am? Why can't I be satisfied with who I am? Why can't I cry when I want to the most? Why don't I have the courage to fess up and make things less difficult in the long run even though I'm scared of what will happen? Why is it that life sucks so bad yet is better than I could ever imagine all at the same time? Why is it that whenever I have a good day my parents come home and ruin it all? Why is it that I have to be 18 right now, I can't be in my own house with the kids in school and planning dinner for when my beautiful husband comes home? Why is it that I can't be the woman of God everyone makes me out to be? Why can't I be the woman of God that God wants me to be? Why can't I be the woman of God that I want to be? Why are the simplest things in life so hard? Why can't I just live on my own, free of the burdens of parents - yes, they are more of a burden, more of a nuisance than help. Why is it that even though I know the answers to the problems I don't know how to fix them? Why is it that I keep myself from crawling into a hole and letting myself rot? Why is it that I can help others better than I can help myself? Why is it that no matter what I do I end up hurting someone? Why is it that the best things in life are often forbidden by people who love you? Why is it that I have to question my parent's reasoning on things? Why is it that even though I try and see things from their point of view this time it doesn't work and their reasoning doesn't make sense? Why has it come to the point where I have to tell my parents to tell me that they love me? Why do I set goals for myself and fail them everytime? Why am I so optomistic when I have everything against me? Why is everything against me? Why am I so negative? Why can't I sleep at night? Why do I stay in this perishable container instead of going home? Why does it feel like I love people more than they love me? Why is it that when I have a bad day certain people blame it on relationships? Why to my friend's friends have to be such jerks and make my friends miserable constantly? Why is my life surrounded by drama? Why is there no way out of this? Why do I feel so helpless? Why do I feel like I have to do all the work for anything to change? Why am I writing this instead of getting schoolwork done? Why is it that I let everyone down? Why is it that Target isn't hiring right now? Why do you have to schedule an interview for Chili's? Why aren't any pet clinics hiring? Why am I so immature? Why do I have to feel and think this way? Why?
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Why do I have to be the stupidest person on the face of this planet? Why is it that after being so "good" all my life (wanting to do wrong but doing good because that was what was better) I am now faced with more rebellion than ever and falling into it little by little? Why is it that I have to be who I am? Why can't I be satisfied with who I am? Why can't I cry when I want to the most? Why don't I have the courage to fess up and make things less difficult in the long run even though I'm scared of what will happen? Why is it that life sucks so bad yet is better than I could ever imagine all at the same time? Why is it that whenever I have a good day my parents come home and ruin it all? Why is it that I have to be 18 right now, I can't be in my own house with the kids in school and planning dinner for when my beautiful husband comes home? Why is it that I can't be the woman of God everyone makes me out to be? Why can't I be the woman of God that God wants me to be? Why can't I be the woman of God that I want to be? Why are the simplest things in life so hard? Why can't I just live on my own, free of the burdens of parents - yes, they are more of a burden, more of a nuisance than help. Why is it that even though I know the answers to the problems I don't know how to fix them? Why is it that I keep myself from crawling into a hole and letting myself rot? Why is it that I can help others better than I can help myself? Why is it that no matter what I do I end up hurting someone? Why is it that the best things in life are often forbidden by people who love you? Why is it that I have to question my parent's reasoning on things? Why is it that even though I try and see things from their point of view this time it doesn't work and their reasoning doesn't make sense? Why has it come to the point where I have to tell my parents to tell me that they love me? Why do I set goals for myself and fail them everytime? Why am I so optomistic when I have everything against me? Why is everything against me? Why am I so negative? Why can't I sleep at night? Why do I stay in this perishable container instead of going home? Why does it feel like I love people more than they love me? Why is it that when I have a bad day certain people blame it on relationships? Why to my friend's friends have to be such jerks and make my friends miserable constantly? Why is my life surrounded by drama? Why is there no way out of this? Why do I feel so helpless? Why do I feel like I have to do all the work for anything to change? Why am I writing this instead of getting schoolwork done? Why is it that I let everyone down? Why is it that Target isn't hiring right now? Why do you have to schedule an interview for Chili's? Why aren't any pet clinics hiring? Why am I so immature? Why do I have to feel and think this way? Why?
Monday, February 21, 2005
Frustrationen, Plus - Entry Auf Deutsch und Englisch
O.K., so yeah. Meine Eltern sind schlecht. Manchmal glaube ich, wie sie dort gerecht sind, mein Leben schwierig zu bilden und sie so mit unglaublichem Erfolg vollenden. Ich wünsche, daß ich wie "die normalen" Zicklein aufgewachsen war, gegangen zur realen Schule, hatte "normale" Probleme, die zum Gehen zur realen Schule gehören, hatte eine "normale" Familie mit einem "normalen" Einkommen...
Meine größte Furcht ist im Augenblick, daß ich nicht High School graduiere. Wenn ich nicht, werde ich versuchen, mich in der Blume-Damm-Höhe einzuschreiben (oder Denton oder Marcus, wenn es zu dem kommt), damit ich mein letztes Jahr von highschool durchführen kann. Ich Wille vermutlich (auf alles dieses) muß folgendes Jahr entfernen und nichts tun aber ganztägig arbeiten, um genügend Geld für Schule folgendes Jahr anzuheben. Mein Traum (ja, ist es jetzt ein fast unmögliches, Traum zu erwerben), soll zu NCTC gehen folgender Fall. Ha. Gutes Glück mit allem das, recht?
Grr. Das Leben saugt. Der einzige Grund, den ich nicht weg laufen lasse, ist wegen Josh. Er ist meine Stärke, meine Vernunft. Er erklärt mir was Recht ist und erklärt mir, daß ich falsch bin, ob ich es hören möchte oder nicht. Die meisten von was er sagt, ist was ich bereits denke, aber ich hören auf Leute besser, als ich auf mich höre. Für dieses danke ich Ihnen Josh. Sie lieben mich und Sie kümmern um mir, helfen Sie mir und halten mich, wenn ich unten bin, Sie anregen mich wie keine anderes. Sie wünschen, was für mich am besten ist und behandeln mich wie ich sind das beste. Danke, Baby. Ich liebe Dich.
Nr., Geld ist nicht die einzige Sache, die mich von weg laufen, Seanathan stoppt. Wie ich gerade schrieb, ist Josh das andere Teil. Ich habe "Freunde" auch, aber ich denke nicht, daß irgendwelche von ihnen die rechte Denkrichtung haben, zum zu bitten mich, sie nicht zu tun. Sie konnten, aber nur aus Ihren eigenen Gründen. So im Allgemeinen, Geld und Josh. Gott hat nichts, mit diesem zu tun. Ich habe eine harte Zeit ihn im Augenblick sehend. Ich weiß, was I "glauben", aber ich nicht denke, daß ich ihm glaube. Ich einmal und ich weiß nicht, warum ich nicht jetzt. Ich weiß nicht was zu tun.
Ich denke, daß ich Überprüfung selbst in das lokale geisteskranke Asyl einsteigen werde...
Sie wünschten mich nicht. Besagt war ich verrückt oder etwas wie der. * läuft in die Abstand schreienden und das Wellenartig bewegen Arme wütend über ihrem Kopf weg und laut lacht * j/k. Ich würde nicht lachen.
Ich fühle wie wieder schreien. Ich kann mich glauben, bitter zu werden, also hatte ich besseren Rückzug zum geistlosen Zustand, der mein schoolwork ist.
*TRANSLATION*
Ok, so yeah. My parents are evil. Sometimes I feel like they're there just to make my life difficult and they're accomplishing such with unbelievable success. I wish I had grown up like "normal" kids, gone to real school, had "normal" problems that go with going to real school, had a "normal" family with a "normal" income...
My biggest fear right now is that I won't graduate high school. If I don't, I am going to try to enroll myself in Flower Mound High (or Denton, or Marcus if it comes to that) so that I can complete my last year of highschool. I'll probably (on top of all this) have to take off next year and do nothing but work full-time to raise enough money for school next year. My dream (yes, it is now an almost impossible to acquire dream) is to go to NCTC next fall. Ha. Good luck with all that, right?
Grr. Life sucks. The only reason I'm not running away is because of Josh. He is my strength, my sanity. He tells me what's right and tells me that I'm wrong whether I want to hear it or not. Most of what he says is what I'm thinking already, but I listen to people better than I listen to myself. For this, I thank you Josh. You love me and you take care of me, you help me and hold me when I'm down, you encourage me like none other. You want what's best for me and treat me like I am the best. Thank you, babe. I love you.
No, money is not the only thing stopping me from running away, Seanathan. As I just wrote, Josh is the other part. I have "friends" too, but I don't think any of them have the right mindset to tell me not to do it. You might, but only for your own reasons. So basically, money and Josh. God has nothing to do with this. I'm having a hard time seeing Him right now. I know what I "believe" but I don't think I believe it. I did once, and I don't know why I don't now. I don't know what to do.
I think I'm going to go check myself into the local insane asylum...
They didn't want me. Said I was crazy or something like that. *runs off into the distance screaming and waving arms madly over her head, laughing loudly* j/k. I wouldn't be laughing.
I feel like crying again. I can feel myself becoming bitter, so I had better retreat to the mindless state that is my schoolwork.
|
O.K., so yeah. Meine Eltern sind schlecht. Manchmal glaube ich, wie sie dort gerecht sind, mein Leben schwierig zu bilden und sie so mit unglaublichem Erfolg vollenden. Ich wünsche, daß ich wie "die normalen" Zicklein aufgewachsen war, gegangen zur realen Schule, hatte "normale" Probleme, die zum Gehen zur realen Schule gehören, hatte eine "normale" Familie mit einem "normalen" Einkommen...
Meine größte Furcht ist im Augenblick, daß ich nicht High School graduiere. Wenn ich nicht, werde ich versuchen, mich in der Blume-Damm-Höhe einzuschreiben (oder Denton oder Marcus, wenn es zu dem kommt), damit ich mein letztes Jahr von highschool durchführen kann. Ich Wille vermutlich (auf alles dieses) muß folgendes Jahr entfernen und nichts tun aber ganztägig arbeiten, um genügend Geld für Schule folgendes Jahr anzuheben. Mein Traum (ja, ist es jetzt ein fast unmögliches, Traum zu erwerben), soll zu NCTC gehen folgender Fall. Ha. Gutes Glück mit allem das, recht?
Grr. Das Leben saugt. Der einzige Grund, den ich nicht weg laufen lasse, ist wegen Josh. Er ist meine Stärke, meine Vernunft. Er erklärt mir was Recht ist und erklärt mir, daß ich falsch bin, ob ich es hören möchte oder nicht. Die meisten von was er sagt, ist was ich bereits denke, aber ich hören auf Leute besser, als ich auf mich höre. Für dieses danke ich Ihnen Josh. Sie lieben mich und Sie kümmern um mir, helfen Sie mir und halten mich, wenn ich unten bin, Sie anregen mich wie keine anderes. Sie wünschen, was für mich am besten ist und behandeln mich wie ich sind das beste. Danke, Baby. Ich liebe Dich.
Nr., Geld ist nicht die einzige Sache, die mich von weg laufen, Seanathan stoppt. Wie ich gerade schrieb, ist Josh das andere Teil. Ich habe "Freunde" auch, aber ich denke nicht, daß irgendwelche von ihnen die rechte Denkrichtung haben, zum zu bitten mich, sie nicht zu tun. Sie konnten, aber nur aus Ihren eigenen Gründen. So im Allgemeinen, Geld und Josh. Gott hat nichts, mit diesem zu tun. Ich habe eine harte Zeit ihn im Augenblick sehend. Ich weiß, was I "glauben", aber ich nicht denke, daß ich ihm glaube. Ich einmal und ich weiß nicht, warum ich nicht jetzt. Ich weiß nicht was zu tun.
Ich denke, daß ich Überprüfung selbst in das lokale geisteskranke Asyl einsteigen werde...
Sie wünschten mich nicht. Besagt war ich verrückt oder etwas wie der. * läuft in die Abstand schreienden und das Wellenartig bewegen Arme wütend über ihrem Kopf weg und laut lacht * j/k. Ich würde nicht lachen.
Ich fühle wie wieder schreien. Ich kann mich glauben, bitter zu werden, also hatte ich besseren Rückzug zum geistlosen Zustand, der mein schoolwork ist.
*TRANSLATION*
Ok, so yeah. My parents are evil. Sometimes I feel like they're there just to make my life difficult and they're accomplishing such with unbelievable success. I wish I had grown up like "normal" kids, gone to real school, had "normal" problems that go with going to real school, had a "normal" family with a "normal" income...
My biggest fear right now is that I won't graduate high school. If I don't, I am going to try to enroll myself in Flower Mound High (or Denton, or Marcus if it comes to that) so that I can complete my last year of highschool. I'll probably (on top of all this) have to take off next year and do nothing but work full-time to raise enough money for school next year. My dream (yes, it is now an almost impossible to acquire dream) is to go to NCTC next fall. Ha. Good luck with all that, right?
Grr. Life sucks. The only reason I'm not running away is because of Josh. He is my strength, my sanity. He tells me what's right and tells me that I'm wrong whether I want to hear it or not. Most of what he says is what I'm thinking already, but I listen to people better than I listen to myself. For this, I thank you Josh. You love me and you take care of me, you help me and hold me when I'm down, you encourage me like none other. You want what's best for me and treat me like I am the best. Thank you, babe. I love you.
No, money is not the only thing stopping me from running away, Seanathan. As I just wrote, Josh is the other part. I have "friends" too, but I don't think any of them have the right mindset to tell me not to do it. You might, but only for your own reasons. So basically, money and Josh. God has nothing to do with this. I'm having a hard time seeing Him right now. I know what I "believe" but I don't think I believe it. I did once, and I don't know why I don't now. I don't know what to do.
I think I'm going to go check myself into the local insane asylum...
They didn't want me. Said I was crazy or something like that. *runs off into the distance screaming and waving arms madly over her head, laughing loudly* j/k. I wouldn't be laughing.
I feel like crying again. I can feel myself becoming bitter, so I had better retreat to the mindless state that is my schoolwork.
Friday, February 18, 2005
Out Of Town - Plus, Huh???
Hey guys. I'm going on the Women's Retreat this weekend :/ so I won't be able to post until Monday.
Yesterday was good, other than having to fight with William. John, Wm and I all got the living room, kitchen, our bathroom and the hallway clean, I made dinner (from a cookbook) and baked a cake, all before the parents got home. Mom thanked me several times and she also gave me a hug before I left for SAPNOT - weird. I don't mind at all, I just want to know why - it's very out of character (as you can see from my previous blog) for her.
Well I have to go make myself some breakfast. Have a great weekend! Tschüs!
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Hey guys. I'm going on the Women's Retreat this weekend :/ so I won't be able to post until Monday.
Yesterday was good, other than having to fight with William. John, Wm and I all got the living room, kitchen, our bathroom and the hallway clean, I made dinner (from a cookbook) and baked a cake, all before the parents got home. Mom thanked me several times and she also gave me a hug before I left for SAPNOT - weird. I don't mind at all, I just want to know why - it's very out of character (as you can see from my previous blog) for her.
Well I have to go make myself some breakfast. Have a great weekend! Tschüs!
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Ich Möchte Deutsch Sprechen! - Plus, Parental Troubles
Ich wünsche, daß ich fließenden Deutschen sprechen und schreiben konnte. Ich habe eine harte Zeit erlernend, daß neue Wörter und er sehr frustrierend erhalten. Grr. Es war, also einfach zuerst und jetzt ist es, wie ich eine Wand schlage. Ich halte, an ihm zu arbeiten, aber für jetzt, frustriert es. Ich wünsche, daß ich zu einer realen Schule mit wirklichen Lehrern ging und reale Arbeit erledigte. Das ganzes dieses ist Mist.
TRANSLATION: I wish I knew how to speak and write fluent German. I'm having a hard time learning new words and it's getting very frustrating. Grr. It was so easy at first and now it's like I hit a wall. I'll keep working at it, but for now, it's frustrating. I wish I went to a real school with real teachers and did real work. All of this is crap.
I am so tempted to put all of my entries in German, but then you wouldn't understand them. Maybe I'll only put pieces of the entry in German. I don't know.
My parents frustrate me. They've been rude to me for no apparent reason and I can't talk to them about it because all they'll do is yell at me. I want out of this hen house. I want to be responsible for my mess and my mess only. I say that I'm tired of this house that we live in always looking like a palace for a pig and no matter how hard I try to keep it clean, it is always messy before Mom gets home so she always hears me complaining but never sees anything. And yet she still doesn't try and get the boys to help, she still doesn't aknowledge that I try.
I was told I was pretty last week by my Bible Study leader. I replied with, "Yeah, that's what Josh tells me." She asked if my Dad ever told me that, and I said no. She said that he should. To me, this is a foreign concept. Hearing my parents tell me that they love me and are proud of me, just hearing encouragement of any sort from them is rare. I have to do something extra special, like have the entire house spic and span when they get home, for them to say anything like that, and even then if they're in a bad mood or something they don't say anything at all. There's never a random "I love you" said just because they do. I know they love us, it just doesn't feel like it.
I hate the way my parents parent. I understand that they both have to work all the time to keep the bills payed but when they are home, they're grouchy and bitter, they come onto the scene with no knowledge of the rest of the day's events and just start yelling. Even when they are in a good mood, they don't do anything to help out, they sit and do nothing just because they can even though there's tons of stuff to be done.
Actually, that's more my Mom. My Daddy works on the cars on the weekends and on weeknights he watches Wm when needed and stuff like that. When Mom's home on a weekday, she doesn't normally do schoolwork with Wm (sometimes she does, just not on a regular basis), she just plays games on the internet all day long and then when she comes out and the house is a mess, she yells at us for that. She rarely disciplines Wm. She threatens all the time but she rarely follows through. It's gotten to the point where if she actually does spank him, he fake cries and doesn't change his ways. He's selfish, arrogant, and rude, he talks back to any authority figure (he gets away with it at the house), he is very smart, but he tries to con his way out of things. He'll sneak out of the house to play with his friends when he was told not to and then when he gets caught, he tries to lie his way out of it. It used to work a lot better when he was younger, but now it's harder for him to get Mom to believe him. He bosses people around no matter how old they are. He's very disrespectful. Academically, he's a year behind. I think if my parents put him in school, it would help him academically and perhaps rid him of a few personality defects, or at least let him know that he can't get away with everything. Afterall, what's going to happen when John and I move out? Who'll take care of him then? Yeah, he may be 11, but I don't think he'll be mature enough to take care of himself. Mom will most likely still be working to pay off the debts, so who will stay home with him?
I just wish my parents would show a little love every now and then. Have compassion, let go. Let us be who we are. I'm like a flower trying to grow, but there's a net on top of me holding me down. The weeds are starting to choke me. If I don't get out soon, I may do something drastic. I thought about running away, but you have to have money to do that (food and gas), something which I don't have, yet again because of my parents.
*shakes head* I'm going to go do my schoolwork and quit letting out my feelings on here.
Oh, one more thing before I go. Looking to the bright side of my life, my boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months as of today. This makes me very, very happy. If it weren't for Josh and all my friends, I would have no light. Thank you to all those who are my light.
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Ich wünsche, daß ich fließenden Deutschen sprechen und schreiben konnte. Ich habe eine harte Zeit erlernend, daß neue Wörter und er sehr frustrierend erhalten. Grr. Es war, also einfach zuerst und jetzt ist es, wie ich eine Wand schlage. Ich halte, an ihm zu arbeiten, aber für jetzt, frustriert es. Ich wünsche, daß ich zu einer realen Schule mit wirklichen Lehrern ging und reale Arbeit erledigte. Das ganzes dieses ist Mist.
TRANSLATION: I wish I knew how to speak and write fluent German. I'm having a hard time learning new words and it's getting very frustrating. Grr. It was so easy at first and now it's like I hit a wall. I'll keep working at it, but for now, it's frustrating. I wish I went to a real school with real teachers and did real work. All of this is crap.
I am so tempted to put all of my entries in German, but then you wouldn't understand them. Maybe I'll only put pieces of the entry in German. I don't know.
My parents frustrate me. They've been rude to me for no apparent reason and I can't talk to them about it because all they'll do is yell at me. I want out of this hen house. I want to be responsible for my mess and my mess only. I say that I'm tired of this house that we live in always looking like a palace for a pig and no matter how hard I try to keep it clean, it is always messy before Mom gets home so she always hears me complaining but never sees anything. And yet she still doesn't try and get the boys to help, she still doesn't aknowledge that I try.
I was told I was pretty last week by my Bible Study leader. I replied with, "Yeah, that's what Josh tells me." She asked if my Dad ever told me that, and I said no. She said that he should. To me, this is a foreign concept. Hearing my parents tell me that they love me and are proud of me, just hearing encouragement of any sort from them is rare. I have to do something extra special, like have the entire house spic and span when they get home, for them to say anything like that, and even then if they're in a bad mood or something they don't say anything at all. There's never a random "I love you" said just because they do. I know they love us, it just doesn't feel like it.
I hate the way my parents parent. I understand that they both have to work all the time to keep the bills payed but when they are home, they're grouchy and bitter, they come onto the scene with no knowledge of the rest of the day's events and just start yelling. Even when they are in a good mood, they don't do anything to help out, they sit and do nothing just because they can even though there's tons of stuff to be done.
Actually, that's more my Mom. My Daddy works on the cars on the weekends and on weeknights he watches Wm when needed and stuff like that. When Mom's home on a weekday, she doesn't normally do schoolwork with Wm (sometimes she does, just not on a regular basis), she just plays games on the internet all day long and then when she comes out and the house is a mess, she yells at us for that. She rarely disciplines Wm. She threatens all the time but she rarely follows through. It's gotten to the point where if she actually does spank him, he fake cries and doesn't change his ways. He's selfish, arrogant, and rude, he talks back to any authority figure (he gets away with it at the house), he is very smart, but he tries to con his way out of things. He'll sneak out of the house to play with his friends when he was told not to and then when he gets caught, he tries to lie his way out of it. It used to work a lot better when he was younger, but now it's harder for him to get Mom to believe him. He bosses people around no matter how old they are. He's very disrespectful. Academically, he's a year behind. I think if my parents put him in school, it would help him academically and perhaps rid him of a few personality defects, or at least let him know that he can't get away with everything. Afterall, what's going to happen when John and I move out? Who'll take care of him then? Yeah, he may be 11, but I don't think he'll be mature enough to take care of himself. Mom will most likely still be working to pay off the debts, so who will stay home with him?
I just wish my parents would show a little love every now and then. Have compassion, let go. Let us be who we are. I'm like a flower trying to grow, but there's a net on top of me holding me down. The weeds are starting to choke me. If I don't get out soon, I may do something drastic. I thought about running away, but you have to have money to do that (food and gas), something which I don't have, yet again because of my parents.
*shakes head* I'm going to go do my schoolwork and quit letting out my feelings on here.
Oh, one more thing before I go. Looking to the bright side of my life, my boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months as of today. This makes me very, very happy. If it weren't for Josh and all my friends, I would have no light. Thank you to all those who are my light.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
The Best Valentine's Day Ever!!! - Plus, Other Stuff
I had the greatest day yesterday. This Valentine's Day tops the one in my freshman year when Lori and a bunch of others went to C-Mac's basketball game and out to eat afterwards (can you believe that used to be my best Valentine's Day???) I'm just going to copy what I wrote in my paper journal...
There is now no question in my mind as to how much he loves me.
Last night I got all dressed up in Lara's brown homecoming dress and matching jewelry and shoes, put on makeup, including blush and actually took time to put in on (for once), I drove to Josh's house as instructed and was there five minutes early at that. I walked in, caught him off guard because I was early, and sat on the couch like he asked. His mom informed me that we would be eating outside on the back porch. Josh came back downstairs and I found out that HE was COOKING me steak, baked potatoes, corn-on-the-cob, and a spinach salad (Josh hasn't learned how to cook yet - this was his first big meal). Then (when he had a break from the food) he gave me a perfect yellow rose in a box with four chocolate kisses at the bottom. I took him outside and told him to wait in the driveway until I told him to come over. I went to the car, turned off the dome light, picked up his first present and told him to come over. He got there and asked what I had behind my back. I told him that since it was Valentine's Day I wanted to give him a really, really, really big kiss. He awed ("awwwwww" to be used the rest of the entry) and got closer. As he did, I put the box holding a giant Hershey's kiss in front of him. He took it, grinned, and kissed me, as I had expected him to. He asked, "What's that?" and gestured towards the orange rose I had waiting for him. i gave it to him, he awed and commented on the rose. He pulled back, expecting that was all and I turned around once more. I gave him the puppy and he smelled it, then commented that it smelled just like me. He also said it looked like a Chocolate Lab (that's why I got it for him) and he said that was the only kind of lab he hasn't had yet. We went back inside and then I sat outside at the table while he finished making dinner. Just before he came with our salads he put the outside stereo on the CD he made for me (it was the same music, not the same CD) and put in on my favorite song, number 7 - Mach Die Augen Zu, and put it on repeat. We ate the salad, wonderful dinner and rich cheesecake to none other than that song.
During dinner Josh told me that when we were done eating we would go upstairs to the gameroom and I could pick whatever movie I wanted to and we would watch that. After dinner we went upstairs as planned. I was standing there staring into space, losing myself in Josh's gentle touch when I finally noticed it: an envelope stuck between two DVD's. I pointed it out to him and he pulled it out, flipped it so the front was facing me and handed it to me. I opened it and read this message:
I wasn't prepared to be swept away... but the gentleness of your hand in mine, the passion of your caress, and the warmth of your embrace washed over me and carried me off to places I never knew existed...
I wasn't prepared to be swept away...
...but then I wasn't prepared to find someone as incredible as you.
Then he wrote:
I love you! Happy Valentine's Day Julie!! -Josh
I turned and hugged him, holding back tears. I hugged him for a while, I think it shocked him a little. He told me to pick a movie, I said I couldn't decide, and he said, "Hew about this one?" and right where the envelope was was perhaps my absolute all-time favorite movie, the Notebook. He pulled it out and I commented on the fact that it still had the plastic wrapped around it. He said, "That's because it's yours." I just looked at him. I was speechless. I was still having a hard time breathing just from reading the card. He unwrapped the movie and put it in.
We watched the movie and when it was over, he walked me to my car. It was a picture perfect evening. I had no clue as to what was to happen and loved every minute of it. He's an amazing man, a wonderful boyfriend, and an amazing cook (not to mention the most romantic guy on the face of the Earth).
Enough said.
Lara's teaching tonight. Can't wait to hear what she has come up with. She called me yesterday and I helped her out with a few things...that could be good or bad. :
Seanathan wants me to go to the lake with him and some other people tonight after school, but John and I have midschool to go to. We may end up taking SAPNOT out there this Thursday. We'll see.
Well, I have schoolwork to do and lunch to eat (not necessarily in that order - lol) so I'd better be off. *girly squeal* I am the luckiest girl in the whole world!!!
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I had the greatest day yesterday. This Valentine's Day tops the one in my freshman year when Lori and a bunch of others went to C-Mac's basketball game and out to eat afterwards (can you believe that used to be my best Valentine's Day???) I'm just going to copy what I wrote in my paper journal...
There is now no question in my mind as to how much he loves me.
Last night I got all dressed up in Lara's brown homecoming dress and matching jewelry and shoes, put on makeup, including blush and actually took time to put in on (for once), I drove to Josh's house as instructed and was there five minutes early at that. I walked in, caught him off guard because I was early, and sat on the couch like he asked. His mom informed me that we would be eating outside on the back porch. Josh came back downstairs and I found out that HE was COOKING me steak, baked potatoes, corn-on-the-cob, and a spinach salad (Josh hasn't learned how to cook yet - this was his first big meal). Then (when he had a break from the food) he gave me a perfect yellow rose in a box with four chocolate kisses at the bottom. I took him outside and told him to wait in the driveway until I told him to come over. I went to the car, turned off the dome light, picked up his first present and told him to come over. He got there and asked what I had behind my back. I told him that since it was Valentine's Day I wanted to give him a really, really, really big kiss. He awed ("awwwwww" to be used the rest of the entry) and got closer. As he did, I put the box holding a giant Hershey's kiss in front of him. He took it, grinned, and kissed me, as I had expected him to. He asked, "What's that?" and gestured towards the orange rose I had waiting for him. i gave it to him, he awed and commented on the rose. He pulled back, expecting that was all and I turned around once more. I gave him the puppy and he smelled it, then commented that it smelled just like me. He also said it looked like a Chocolate Lab (that's why I got it for him) and he said that was the only kind of lab he hasn't had yet. We went back inside and then I sat outside at the table while he finished making dinner. Just before he came with our salads he put the outside stereo on the CD he made for me (it was the same music, not the same CD) and put in on my favorite song, number 7 - Mach Die Augen Zu, and put it on repeat. We ate the salad, wonderful dinner and rich cheesecake to none other than that song.
During dinner Josh told me that when we were done eating we would go upstairs to the gameroom and I could pick whatever movie I wanted to and we would watch that. After dinner we went upstairs as planned. I was standing there staring into space, losing myself in Josh's gentle touch when I finally noticed it: an envelope stuck between two DVD's. I pointed it out to him and he pulled it out, flipped it so the front was facing me and handed it to me. I opened it and read this message:
I wasn't prepared to be swept away... but the gentleness of your hand in mine, the passion of your caress, and the warmth of your embrace washed over me and carried me off to places I never knew existed...
I wasn't prepared to be swept away...
...but then I wasn't prepared to find someone as incredible as you.
Then he wrote:
I love you! Happy Valentine's Day Julie!! -Josh
I turned and hugged him, holding back tears. I hugged him for a while, I think it shocked him a little. He told me to pick a movie, I said I couldn't decide, and he said, "Hew about this one?" and right where the envelope was was perhaps my absolute all-time favorite movie, the Notebook. He pulled it out and I commented on the fact that it still had the plastic wrapped around it. He said, "That's because it's yours." I just looked at him. I was speechless. I was still having a hard time breathing just from reading the card. He unwrapped the movie and put it in.
We watched the movie and when it was over, he walked me to my car. It was a picture perfect evening. I had no clue as to what was to happen and loved every minute of it. He's an amazing man, a wonderful boyfriend, and an amazing cook (not to mention the most romantic guy on the face of the Earth).
Enough said.
Lara's teaching tonight. Can't wait to hear what she has come up with. She called me yesterday and I helped her out with a few things...that could be good or bad. :
Seanathan wants me to go to the lake with him and some other people tonight after school, but John and I have midschool to go to. We may end up taking SAPNOT out there this Thursday. We'll see.
Well, I have schoolwork to do and lunch to eat (not necessarily in that order - lol) so I'd better be off. *girly squeal* I am the luckiest girl in the whole world!!!
Monday, February 14, 2005
So Excited! - Plus, Without A Hitch
Oh my gosh! I am so pumped it's not even funny! My beloved boyfriend Josh has planned a date for me for tonight. He won't tell me where we're going or what we're doing, he told me to be at his house at 6:30 tonight all dressed up. I'm so excited!!! Lara knows what it is and has been taunting me about it non-stop, not that I mind...I love surprises. I can't wait to see what it is!
Lara and John's date went without a hitch. It was so romantic, their spot by the lake. The table was beautiful, the candles were set by the quilt and in a walkway leading to the table - it was picturesque. And wow! Lara was gorgeous!!! So was John. He loved it, he absolutely loved it! I'm so happy for them.
Well, that's really all I have to update about. I'll talk to you all later, tell you what my surprise was and all. Tschüs!
My new favorite German phrase: Mach die augen zu und küss mich...
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Oh my gosh! I am so pumped it's not even funny! My beloved boyfriend Josh has planned a date for me for tonight. He won't tell me where we're going or what we're doing, he told me to be at his house at 6:30 tonight all dressed up. I'm so excited!!! Lara knows what it is and has been taunting me about it non-stop, not that I mind...I love surprises. I can't wait to see what it is!
Lara and John's date went without a hitch. It was so romantic, their spot by the lake. The table was beautiful, the candles were set by the quilt and in a walkway leading to the table - it was picturesque. And wow! Lara was gorgeous!!! So was John. He loved it, he absolutely loved it! I'm so happy for them.
Well, that's really all I have to update about. I'll talk to you all later, tell you what my surprise was and all. Tschüs!
My new favorite German phrase: Mach die augen zu und küss mich...
Friday, February 11, 2005
So Pumped Because It's Friday! - Plus, Great Times Ahead
You heard it, folks, today is Friday! So excited for the weekend! Today I'm helping Lara with her date for John, then I'm going to the worship thing at church (Amie's amazing!). Tomorrow afternoon I have a date with my gorgeous boyfriend, and Sunday I have church. AMAZING!!! I'm so pumped right now!
John and I have been practicing all morning. I'm on piano and he's on bass - we're practicing for SAPNOT (our Thursday night Bible study). We had practiced yesterday before we went, but John only felt comfortable playing three songs and didn't want to lug the heavy amp for three songs, so he didn't play last night. I played, I was by myself, playing and singing, and Seanathan came over and sang with me. It was great fun. Just think, next week, John will bring his bass, then it'll be even better! Our favorite song to play is "As The Deer." Great song! Yeah, my pinky hurts from playing octaves all morning.
Can't wait for my date tomorrow. I hope we play DDR. I'm addicted and I've played once. Technically twice, the first time I was in Gameworks and was humiliated - the arrows were sticky and didn't respond, plus I had Josh on my right on heavy doing really well, of course, while I was stuck stinking on beginner. Ah well. I played at his house and started on beginner but it was too easy, so he put me on light. I did that for a while, got to where I started getting B's and C's instead of E's. (E is worst, A is best, just like in school - ha) I got my first A, so I moved up to standard. I can only play easy standards though because I'm not THAT good. I'll quit rambling about DDR now.
I'm excited to help Lara out tonight. I wish I could be there to see the look on John's face when he sees her all dressed up, with a hot meal and roses on the table, romantic candlelight, the whole atmosphere is overwhelming... *snaps out of it* Yeah. It'll be so much fun for all three of us, but the two of them moreso I'm sure. At least I'd hope that's how it goes.
I can't wait until I give Josh his anniversary dinner. That'll be fun. Can't wait. *daydreams*
Well, I've rambled enough for you people. Comment if you have anything to say. Or don't. Whatever works. See you shmoes later.
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You heard it, folks, today is Friday! So excited for the weekend! Today I'm helping Lara with her date for John, then I'm going to the worship thing at church (Amie's amazing!). Tomorrow afternoon I have a date with my gorgeous boyfriend, and Sunday I have church. AMAZING!!! I'm so pumped right now!
John and I have been practicing all morning. I'm on piano and he's on bass - we're practicing for SAPNOT (our Thursday night Bible study). We had practiced yesterday before we went, but John only felt comfortable playing three songs and didn't want to lug the heavy amp for three songs, so he didn't play last night. I played, I was by myself, playing and singing, and Seanathan came over and sang with me. It was great fun. Just think, next week, John will bring his bass, then it'll be even better! Our favorite song to play is "As The Deer." Great song! Yeah, my pinky hurts from playing octaves all morning.
Can't wait for my date tomorrow. I hope we play DDR. I'm addicted and I've played once. Technically twice, the first time I was in Gameworks and was humiliated - the arrows were sticky and didn't respond, plus I had Josh on my right on heavy doing really well, of course, while I was stuck stinking on beginner. Ah well. I played at his house and started on beginner but it was too easy, so he put me on light. I did that for a while, got to where I started getting B's and C's instead of E's. (E is worst, A is best, just like in school - ha) I got my first A, so I moved up to standard. I can only play easy standards though because I'm not THAT good. I'll quit rambling about DDR now.
I'm excited to help Lara out tonight. I wish I could be there to see the look on John's face when he sees her all dressed up, with a hot meal and roses on the table, romantic candlelight, the whole atmosphere is overwhelming... *snaps out of it* Yeah. It'll be so much fun for all three of us, but the two of them moreso I'm sure. At least I'd hope that's how it goes.
I can't wait until I give Josh his anniversary dinner. That'll be fun. Can't wait. *daydreams*
Well, I've rambled enough for you people. Comment if you have anything to say. Or don't. Whatever works. See you shmoes later.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Long Time - Plus, Short Update
Sorry it's been so long since I've updated - trust me, I've wanted to! The internet has been down for a week, so there wasn't anything I could do.
I don't have the time to update fully now, but I'll find some time.
Short points:
- Beauty and the Beast was incredible!
- I hyperextended and dislocated my toe on Thursday night, was on crutches. I accidentally popped it without thinking Saturday morning - it's fine now.
- Saturday at the mall and Bijan's was fun. I have good friends.
- My boyfriend is amazing.
- TCBS was awesome! My friends there always know how to make me feel better without actually doing something.
- German is going ok.
- Sunday was a great day! Woot Patriots!
The end.
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Sorry it's been so long since I've updated - trust me, I've wanted to! The internet has been down for a week, so there wasn't anything I could do.
I don't have the time to update fully now, but I'll find some time.
Short points:
- Beauty and the Beast was incredible!
- I hyperextended and dislocated my toe on Thursday night, was on crutches. I accidentally popped it without thinking Saturday morning - it's fine now.
- Saturday at the mall and Bijan's was fun. I have good friends.
- My boyfriend is amazing.
- TCBS was awesome! My friends there always know how to make me feel better without actually doing something.
- German is going ok.
- Sunday was a great day! Woot Patriots!
The end.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Long Day - Plus, There's More Than I Thought
Yesterday was a long day for me. Don't know why, it just felt that way.
TCBS was fun - my core leader wasn't there, don't know why. Nathan ended up messing up the muffler on his suburban because he jumped a curb. Jeffrey can drive now. Kourtney hadn't been there in a while because she didn't want to, the only reason she was there last night was because her parents were punishing her and making her go to church (which is wrong beyond all reason). My core group got the Bible Fist thing this week, I got to claim the prize - that was fun.
I went to Lara's after TCBS and Starbucks and we made two dozen Hershey's kiss roses while talking to her boyfriend John on the phone. That was fun.
I'm still planning a Valentine's surprise for my beloved. I haven't really told him about it yet, only that I might be planning something for then. He he he. Surprises are so much fun! I've got the general idea down, just not the details. This is going to be fun, for both him and I. Sometimes I think I have more fun planning these things than he does doing them, but I know that isn't true.
Josh came to church on Sunday. It was great to have him back. He came to Wingstop with us afterwards and everyone was saying how they missed him coming and stuff - I really liked that. I had a blast that day. He was happy, he talked to Bodnar about programming stuff almost the whole time Bodnar was there. I listened, fascinated, even though I didn't understand most of what they're saying. I have always been fascinated by Josh's love of programming. He loves it so much and he's really good at it. You should see the way his eyes light up when he wants to show me the program he's been making, or when he shows me the program he finished making and looks at me to get my approval. It's amazing to watch him work - if he finds a bug, he doesn't quit until he fixes it. It's incredible to watch, it really is. He is an amazing man. There are so many facets of his greatness, I can't wait to see more.
Well, enough rambling. To be honest, I didn't think that this entry would be very long, but I am pleasantly surprised. Hopefully you are too. Later.
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Yesterday was a long day for me. Don't know why, it just felt that way.
TCBS was fun - my core leader wasn't there, don't know why. Nathan ended up messing up the muffler on his suburban because he jumped a curb. Jeffrey can drive now. Kourtney hadn't been there in a while because she didn't want to, the only reason she was there last night was because her parents were punishing her and making her go to church (which is wrong beyond all reason). My core group got the Bible Fist thing this week, I got to claim the prize - that was fun.
I went to Lara's after TCBS and Starbucks and we made two dozen Hershey's kiss roses while talking to her boyfriend John on the phone. That was fun.
I'm still planning a Valentine's surprise for my beloved. I haven't really told him about it yet, only that I might be planning something for then. He he he. Surprises are so much fun! I've got the general idea down, just not the details. This is going to be fun, for both him and I. Sometimes I think I have more fun planning these things than he does doing them, but I know that isn't true.
Josh came to church on Sunday. It was great to have him back. He came to Wingstop with us afterwards and everyone was saying how they missed him coming and stuff - I really liked that. I had a blast that day. He was happy, he talked to Bodnar about programming stuff almost the whole time Bodnar was there. I listened, fascinated, even though I didn't understand most of what they're saying. I have always been fascinated by Josh's love of programming. He loves it so much and he's really good at it. You should see the way his eyes light up when he wants to show me the program he's been making, or when he shows me the program he finished making and looks at me to get my approval. It's amazing to watch him work - if he finds a bug, he doesn't quit until he fixes it. It's incredible to watch, it really is. He is an amazing man. There are so many facets of his greatness, I can't wait to see more.
Well, enough rambling. To be honest, I didn't think that this entry would be very long, but I am pleasantly surprised. Hopefully you are too. Later.